motherhood happened

Journey of being a mom, and maintaining a healthy life

  • Home
  • About Mary
  • Blog
    • Mindfulness
    • Health & Fitness
    • Food
    • Lifestyle
    • Motherhood
  • Podcast
  • Contact

Change Your Mind to Boost Happiness

04/22/2017

Increase your happiness with a shift in mentality, it makes all the difference! #happy #happiness #meditation #meditate #mindset #mindfulness #mentalhealth #mentalhealthawareness #motherhoodhappened

Getting in a low mood is tough. It happens. I often had these moments where I would get in a funk. I still go through them today, they are rare (thankfully!) but I am not perfect. I learned a few months ago how having a positive mind and spirit will absolutely change everything. The following is what I have learned to boost my own happiness.

This post contains affiliate links. For more information, see my disclosures here. 

Life is not conspiring against us.

The more you truly accept that, the better your life becomes. Patience is incredibly difficult when you are going through something rough whether that is a breakup or not getting the dream job you wanted. Patience is hard nevertheless, if you are patient you will see how life works with you instead of against you.

There may be some things that do happen randomly, out of our control, and are extremely unfortunate however for the most part, I do believe my life is a series of choices. I choose to wake up happy, I choose to make light of the small things (like when my son purposely throws his food on the ground and smears his face and hair with it while giggling :), I choose to react or not react to people’s comments, I choose to show my love and appreciation for people regardless of how I get treated in return. These aren’t just things that happen to me. I make choices every step I take throughout my day.

Choose things and thoughts that genuinely make you happy. Have faith that you are on the right path. If it feels right to you, it is the correct path.

Stop focusing on what your life is “supposed” to be and follow your version of happiness.

If life occurred the way it was supposed to, I know without a doubt I would not be here and my son would not be here either. I can’t even imagine a life without him so I am beyond grateful my life did not turn how it was “supposed” to. You create your own standard of life, you choose how you want to live. You pick what you want in your life, you choose the order of it all, you are in control. If you choose to live a happy, stress-free life, you will.

Life does not always go as planned, almost never for me, and that makes life exciting.

Accept the cards you have been dealt, accept reality.

Acceptance is crucial. I see many who get stuck in this rut where they are upset, bothered, or angry with their reality so much so that it does not allow them to move forward. To not accept reality seems silly when you think about it because you cannot change the past and there is literally nothing you can do, reality just is. I have definitely been in that head space where I was stuck in this hole of why me, why this, why that, or I am so angry because of this thing that happened months or years ago. Instead of spending your energy on things you can no longer change, shift your focus to what you can do. Focus on how to move forward and do so.

When I say accept reality I do not mean to just lay back and let things occur because you cannot change them. If you have the power to change something you do not like, you should change it, I am only speaking of things you no longer have the power to change. There is no use in putting energy into something you absolutely cannot change.

Repin this FREE 7-Day Mindfulness Challenge! #mindfulness #mindfulnesschallenge #mentalhealth #happy #happiness #meditation #meditate #mindset #mentalhealthawareness #freecourse #motherhoodhappened

Know that you can only control yourself.

This goes along with putting energy into things you can actually change. We, yes I have done this before, tend to place our happiness in someone else’s hand. Why do we do that? Again, it really does not make sense to do that when you think about it. We are setting ourselves up for failure by placing our happiness in someone else’s hands.

If that person or those individuals do not live up to our expectations we are going to crash down into a funk. We do not have the power or ability to change other people (unless there is something I do not know about, if so, please share!). Since we cannot change others and we cannot control others, we should not depend on others to change or to make us happy.

It sounds super cheesy but you must be happy with yourself. No one else will give you that 100% of the time. If you can sit with yourself alone and be happy, there is nothing greater.

Do not compare yourself to others.

This has been a huge lesson for me. It is tough not to compare yourself to others because of how exposed people are nowadays, I get it. I am all about finding people who inspire you, and who motivate you. However, if you find you are breaking yourself apart by comparing yourself to another that is not okay. This is not about being conceited but it is about being confident. I tell myself no one can surpass me. No one can surpass me because there is no other me. I am the only me there is so how could I be envious about someone else when that other person can never be “more” than me. I hope that makes sense.

Do not focus on being better than somebody else, focus on being better than you use to be.

Stop listening to most.

There is so much out there in movies, music, shows, etc. that perpetuate this idea of us needing other people to be whole. The “you are my other half,” “I can’t live without you,” and the “I need you” may sound sweet to some but I realized these messages are not exactly great. Someone else is not my other half, I want someone to add to my life but I am not half empty. I am whole already. I can live without others, I will be fine without them. I do not need anyone. I want people in my life, I want to live and experience life with others, I want to enrich others’ lives but someone else is not a necessity.

Carefully choose what you feed your mind.

Change your mind.

I completely believe in the idea of whatever energy you put out in the world returns to you. I have seen it too many times on both ends not to believe it. The more positive you are, the more positive things you will attract. Even if you have to fake it at first, I trust you will see how your positive spirit will change things.

There is a beautiful quote by Wayne Dyer which states, “if you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change.”

I say that quote to myself at least once a day. It is so true. Reread it, practice it, and see the changes that occur. You really can shape your life through your thoughts.

Letting go is true freedom.

Let go of everything that gets you down. You don’t have to literally let go of tangible items (unless you want to), but let them go from your mind. Attaching yourself to stuff whether that be material things, people, or ideas I do not believe serves us well. If we attach ourselves to things, the moment they are gone we spiral down.

Start small, let go of things little by little and you will feel lighter. The more you let go, the freer you become.

Check out the meditation app I use every single day! #mindfulness #mindfulnesschallenge #mentalhealth #happy #happiness #meditation #meditate #mindset #mentalhealthawareness #freecourse #motherhoodhappened

Use Code: AWARE50 to get 50% off your subscription if you decide to subscribe pass the free resources available to you!

Meditation saved me.

There is a true beauty to stillness. You can do guided meditations which you can easily find on YouTube or you can meditate alone. You can meditate while laying down in bed, you can sit up on a chair or on the floor. It can be a couple of minutes or an hour long. You choose what works for you.

There are not enough words to describe what meditation has done for me. It allows me to leave the world for a bit and focus on myself. Focusing on my breathing clears my mind of all stress, all things, and keeps me present. Before meditation I always heard people say to be present and I had no idea what that meant. After mediating, I now understand what being present means. It is hard to describe what it is like exactly but I know it is beautiful. Not thinking of before and after yet instead focusing on the now is amazing.

I would suggest guided meditation to start off since you will be guided on what exactly to do. Put on your earphones and drift away. I feel so relaxed and in the best state of mind after I meditate.

Tao Te Ching

Some consider Taoism a religion, others a philosophy. I study it from a philosophical view and I enjoy it. The book Tao Te Ching (click here to get) has open my mind to many things and has helped me TREMENDOUSLY when I get down. I do think it is worth looking into at least regardless of your religious background. It is a quick read, and enlightening. I won’t say too much on it but it is worth a look.

This post contains affiliate links. For more information, see my disclosures here. 

As always, thank you so much for reading! If I provided value to you and you want to support my work, please head over to my Patreon here. For $5 a month you can directly help me continue providing content for you! 

Related Posts

  • Hard Questions to Ask Yourself Epi 1 #projectlearnyouHard Questions to Ask Yourself Epi 1 #projectlearnyou
  • Reconnecting With Your Partner After a BabyReconnecting With Your Partner After a Baby
  • Starting Your Fitness JourneyStarting Your Fitness Journey
  • Speed Dating: Single … but am I ready to mingle?Speed Dating: Single … but am I ready to mingle?
«
»

Filed Under: Health & Fitness, Lifestyle, Mindfulness Leave a Comment

Leave a Reply Cancel reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

welcome

Hi there, friend! I'm Mary and I'm delighted you came across my blog! I take joy in connecting, and sharing my experiences with others to provide value to anyone I can. My story is a rough one but it is also one that turned positive and I hope it can help others. We may cry, we may laugh but what I can guarantee is growth. I write about food, fitness, mindfulness, self-awareness, and overall things I have learned to become the best version of myself.

Enjoy browsing! Click here to learn more about my journey...

Connect With Me!

  • Facebook
  • Instagram
  • Pinterest
  • Twitter
  • YouTube

New to Mindfulness? – Start Here!

Search

Click below to grab my free guide!

Want To Grow Your Email List??

Free 7-Day Mindfulness Course

Learn the EXACT steps I used to overcome depression, be present, and have inner peace!

Get Organized With Printables

Check out these FREE organizational printables! Over 25 pretty printables to organize your home and life! #motherhoodhappened #printables #freeprintables #organizationalprintables #letsorganize #freecalendar

How I Increase My Traffic Through Pinterest

Latest on Instagram

_marygissellbarahona

If you felt lonely and not good enough in 2020, le If you felt lonely and not good enough in 2020, lets start the year with a different mindset. ⁣
⁣
You ARE worthy. You ARE worthy of love. You ARE enough. ⁣
⁣
If you have to repeat it to yourself 20 times a day, do so because it is the truth.⁣
⁣
I know there are moments of loneliness and defeat where it does not feel true but know that it is. Your sense of worthiness must come from within, no one will ever fill that void for you. ⁣
⁣
No one "worthy" will find you worthy if you do not begin valuing yourself. ⁣
⁣
You got this! ⁣
⁣
Love, Mary ❤
Remember you are special too.⁣
⁣
Love, Mary ❤
You absolutely can and will. Believe that, work, a You absolutely can and will. Believe that, work, and see how things change. ⁣
⁣
You got this!⁣
⁣
Love, Mary ❤
We often view being productive as something we sho We often view being productive as something we should aspire to be every single day. I know many of us feel bad or guilty when we are not what we usually deem to be productive. ⁣
⁣
It is okay to relax. It is okay to get absolutely nothing accomplished today. There is a balance to life. There is room for productivity and room to relax. Make space for both and do not feel guilty about it. ⁣
⁣
Love, Mary ❤⁣
⁣
#treatyourselfwell # #youareworthy #singlemomlife #singlemom #singleparent #singlemother #singlemomstrong #selfcarequotes #selflovetips #selflovefirst #womenempoweringwomen
I think we often forget this. People are not alway I think we often forget this. People are not always going to agree with us. It is okay for us to not like that feeling. We want to be understood, and we want others to agree with us. ⁣
⁣
However, both being kind and disagreeing with someone can exist together. ⁣
⁣
With family and friend gatherings (whether in person or through zoom) comes debates and disagreements in regard to many things. ⁣
⁣
Shifting our perspective to appreciating disagreements instead of disliking them could help manage our feelings better in the moments of disagreements. ⁣
⁣
Have an amazing day!⁣
Love, Mary ❤
We compare ourselves to others often, especially d We compare ourselves to others often, especially during the holidays. We can be happy for others while also being a bit down that we don't have that certain thing. Maybe it is a pregnancy, an engagement, a new home, or even a new job. ⁣
⁣
Whatever it is know that just because someone else currently has it or is experiencing it, that in itself does NOT mean you can not experience it one day. ⁣
⁣
I know it is difficult to see the light at the end of the tunnel sometimes but do not give up, be patient, and continue working towards your goals and desires. ⁣
⁣
You got this girl!⁣
⁣
Love, Mary ❤
I think most families can relate to something on t I think most families can relate to something on this list. Families are not perfect nor will they ever be but that does not mean you should not stand up for yourself when something does not sit well with you.⁣
⁣
You don't want to make things awkward, don't want to disrupt or bother? ⁣
⁣
I get it, I think the same way. I am the pleaser, the peacemaker. ⁣
⁣
But as I learn more and grow I am realizing how important it is to stick up for myself. ⁣
⁣
If a question or comment bothers you, speak on it. It is okay to have feelings and have your feelings heard if you so choose. ⁣
⁣
Of course, there are respectful and healthy ways of communicating but DO NOT dismiss your feelings or your desire to be your own advocate. ⁣
⁣
I know it is harder to do with loved ones because frankly, loved ones are the ones that hurt us the most because we care so much about what they think and say. ⁣
⁣
That said, be really conscious and perhaps practice responses before the holiday party. I think we usually know what others are going to pick at us for because it usually is the same thing over and over again. Practice sticking up for yourself, you got this!
Families do not all look the same. We have differe Families do not all look the same. We have different kinds of relationships that may not be "picture perfect" and that is okay. Especially during these times many jump to the assumption that we all have "normal" families (whatever that means). ⁣
⁣
But we are complex people and with that comes complex relationships with one another. Don't be ashamed for not having the relationship people expect you to have. ⁣
⁣
If you want to work on these relationships then great but if you do not want to that's alright too. Don't let others shame you for not having a great relationship with a parent, a sibling, being separated and having a coparenting relationship, whatever is "out of the norm."⁣
⁣
Protect your soul and know that no one family is perfect.
Believe this to be true, because it is. There are Believe this to be true, because it is. There are moments we feel like we can not go on because we are not good enough, smart enough, or strong enough. ⁣
⁣
But you are. Do NOT quit and keep going. This hardship is not going to last forever even though it may seem like it presently. Everything comes to end whether it is good or bad. ⁣
⁣
Know that you ARE strong enough to handle the day, you got this! If I have to keep reminding you that you are ... I will :) ⁣
⁣
Love, Mary ❤
Your mindset has such a MASSIVE influence on how y Your mindset has such a MASSIVE influence on how your day goes. Yes, there are outside influences or external reasons for our days to go to shit (I definitely know this haha) but really taking advantage of the things we do have control over (our minds) can be tremendous. ⁣
⁣
Start this week having a positive mindset and see how your perspective affects your day. Our minds are powerful, let's care for them and use them well! You got this!⁣
⁣
Love, Mary ❤
With the holiday season comes family times and it With the holiday season comes family times and it is usually presented or known as a positive and beautiful time, which it can be. But that is not the case for everyone. ⁣
⁣
Coming together may mean facing uncomfortable realities or truths we may not be ready to deal with or forgive yet. ⁣
⁣
I think many of us also think we have forgiven a situation or a person when we really have not. (I definitely have!) ⁣
⁣
It is not an easy task to accomplish but with some time and work it can be done. ⁣
⁣
Which one resonates with you the most? ⁣
⁣
Love, Mary ❤
Taking care of yourself as a mom is at times diffi Taking care of yourself as a mom is at times difficult if I am honest. We are so used to putting our little ones or even other adults before us. It comes naturally to us. ⁣
⁣
With that said, I do think it is CRUCIAL to take care of ourselves as moms especially because others rely on us but we are individuals too that ALSO need caring!⁣
⁣
These 4 ways to take care of yourself as a mom are things we would prioritize for kids, so let's prioritize it for us too!⁣
⁣
⁣
⭐Nourishing our bodies: eating foods to energize us and treat our bodies well ⁣
⁣
⭐Practice good sleep hygiene: create a nighttime routine you can stick to and is realistic in order to get the peaceful sleep you need every night⁣
⁣
⭐Heal emotionally: take care of your emotional health, many times we have no idea how much this affects our lives subconsciously or subliminally ⁣
⁣
⭐Build and sustain relationships: making new relationships and sustaining old ones are super important. As humans we need one another, relationships are incredibly important to us. Making sure to set aside some time to foster those will aid in taking care of yourself. ⁣
⁣
What are some additional ways you take care of yourself? Let me know!!⁣
⁣
Love, Mary ❤
How to get over a breakup fast, is it possible?! ⁣
⁣
New YouTube video is now live. I react to one of @tatycokley videos which is amazing! I love her spirit in this video but I break down her tips on moving forward after a break up. ⁣

Link in bio.
⁣
How fast do you think one can move past or get over a breakup?? ⁣
⁣
#breakupssucks #breakupmotivation #breakupstatus #breakupadvice #breakupcoach #breakuprecovery #breakupthoughts #breakupsarehard #breakupstory #breakups #reactionsvideos #reactionvideo #reactionvids #youtubecommunity #youtubelife #howtogetoverabreakup #gettingoverhim #gettingoverabreakup #movingontobetterthings
Feeling exhausted? I hear you. We get so exhausted Feeling exhausted? I hear you. We get so exhausted at times to the point where our minds become completely irrational and we want to totally give in and GIVE UP. ⁣
⁣
But DON'T.⁣
⁣
I know it is tough, I know it is not easy, I know you are tired. Take a break. Do something you enjoy or simply rest for a bit but do NOT give up. ⁣
⁣
In the moment we naturally want to protect our bodies and soul so we think the best way to do that is to completely give up the tasks.⁣
⁣
Not always true. ⁣
⁣
Sometimes we need to give our bodies and mind a break so we can be recharged and inspired again. Avoid burn out, take a break, then push forward. ⁣
⁣
You got this girl! ❤❤❤
Positive coparenting is possible! Definitely not a Positive coparenting is possible! Definitely not an easy task ... AT ALL. But with work, patience, and empathy it can be done well. ⁣
⁣
What is the hardest thing you find with coparenting? ⁣
⁣
Like & share if you agree! ❤
Who goes first? I had this conversation with my th Who goes first? I had this conversation with my therapist a few weeks ago and it stuck with me. Naturally I think as moms you want your kids to go first and we end up putting ourselves last, not even second on the priority list. ⁣
⁣
Why can't both come first? I pondered on this for a while but it started making sense to me. Of course in the extreme of life and death my kiddo without question is coming first. Extremes asides, I am getting used to the idea of prioritizing myself just as I would my son. I do not think it is a bad thing, I am beginning to see the benefits of doing so.⁣
⁣
I find that we have an easier and more organized day ⁣
when I am taking care of myself too. I have a better attitude, I have more energy, I feel more accomplished, more patient, and I am more present. ⁣
⁣
It is difficult to adjust if it is not something you are used to but I do think it is important to do. ⁣
⁣
What do you think? Do you think both can go first?
Don't want to get up? Feeling hopeless of what you Don't want to get up? Feeling hopeless of what you can accomplish today? Having a difficult time seeing that you can attain the full picture? I get it, I have been there and honestly I have days where I am STILL there. But what helps me move is the idea of setting myself up. ⁣
⁣
Setting myself up to be #financiallyindependent is a HUGE motivation for me. I have to put in the work to get there. Being a single there is no other option but to be financially independent. I know the work I put in today, I will thank myself for later. ⁣
⁣
Set yourself up, you got this girl!! ⁣
⁣
⁣
#independentwomen #independentwomenquotes #independentsinglemom #momworkinghard #momhustle #momhustler #setyourselffree #setyourselfupforsuccess #motivationwall #motivationalcoach #motivationtoday #motivationtosucceed #motivationtosuccess #inspiredliving #mombloggersofig #momblogs #momblogtribe #mombloginfluence #momblogging #mombloglove #mombloggerlife #mombloggercommunity #mombloggerstribe #momblogger #mombloggersunited #lifecoachingforwomen #lifecoachinghappiness #lifecoachesofinstagram #lifecoachnetwork ⁣
A mental shift is what we need a lot of the time. A mental shift is what we need a lot of the time. We often believe our thoughts to be true when they may not be factual in the slightest. A tiny shift can make the biggest difference in your choices and the outcome of your tomorrow. ⁣
⁣
Which one resonates with you? Tag someone you think needs to read this!
🎥 New YouTube is out! I reacted to a @roommates 🎥 New YouTube is out! I reacted to a @roommateshtx clip I found really interesting about the idea of a super woman. It may be an unpopular opinion but it is something I ponder on often. ⁣
⁣
Link in bio⁣
⁣
#unpopularopinions #unpopular #reactionvideos #reactionvideo #reactionvids #womenempowerwomen #womenempowered #feminism #feminist #feminineenergy #youtubing #youtubevlogger #supportwomen #supportwomeninbusiness #superwomen #theroommatespodcast #singlemen #openmind #openminded
Don't be so hard on yourself. Not everything in pa Don't be so hard on yourself. Not everything in parenthood is going to be absolutely perfect especially if you don't have help or are a #singlemom ⁣
⁣
If you need a break and pop a pizza in the oven do so comfortably! (By the way I recently tried @eatbanza new frozen pizza and it was AMAZING if you want to try with your kiddos :) ⁣
⁣
Point is, stop stressing. If you need a break, take it. Ordering in or serving frozen food does NOT lower your value as a mother, or as a human being. Be kind to yourself today!
Load More... Follow on Instagram

Don’t Miss a Post!

Enter your email address to receive notifications of new posts by email.

Copyright

I appreciate it when you share however, please keep in mind that all text and images on this site are property of Motherhood Happened. Feel free to use one or two photos so long as a link back to my original post is included. Please do not remove any watermarks, crop, or edit any of my images without first obtaining written permission from me. Pinning is always appreciated! Thank you!

Disclosure

We are a participant in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program, an affiliate advertising program designed to provide a means for us to earn fees by linking to Amazon.com and affiliated sites.

Copyright © 2021 · Adorn theme by Restored 316

Copyright © 2019 Motherhood Happened • All rights reserved. • Privacy Policy & Disclosures